Wait, You Ment That Patient?

This morning I was awakened by a man knocking on my door, beckoning to come with him through the pouring rain to the hospital, my first thought was I need to put my bra on. My second was either I am in trouble for taking out Sacrayya's IV last night or he didn't make it through the night. The man left me so I could get dressed, but it was one of those things where you just wake up so you don't really know whats going on so I just put on some clothes and left not really thinking a whole lot about what I looked like. When I got there I could feel right away that it was the second part of my thought, that he didn't make it, that held true. Richardson had called me to the hospital so I could say goodbye to Sacrayya's aunt, who I had spent a lot of time with the past few days. When I walked it I was happy that the body was covered because it has been one of my prayers to never see someone die. His aunt was sitting on the floor and as soon as she saw me she started crying, he had been dead 2 hours but they had just got done with the paperwork and were waiting for me to come before they left in the ambulence. All I could do was hold her hand and give rub her back becuase in India hugging people isn't really common, but I was glad they had gotten me, not so I could see Sacrayya, but so I could be some comfort to his Aunt. This morning when I went back to my house I thought that I was handling very well, not crying at all, because for me he had died yesterday when he stopped waking up, so I've had a chance to get ready and to mourn, but as I went through the day I realized that I was just holding everything in inorder to keep on going. I don't remember the last time I was this emotionally drained. Thats when I remembered the comfort of God and how he can take everything and carry it, so prayer is starting to be something I cling more to every day I'm here.
It's hard building up community with people just to have it torn down when they leave, making me have to build up a new one with patients everytime, it gets exhausting. Dr. Sheeba and some of the nurses have been getting mad at me for not being as safe as I should, they think I'm going to end up getting TB or HIV because supposedly I dont wear gloves all the time, it was really just once that I didn't, not a big deal, but somehow I think they found out I didn't that one time so now they are reminding me a lot on the safety proceedure that I never learned :).
Despite their constant nagg about safety I love the staff here. I feel like I am part of the group, they keep on telling me how much better I am, especially because now I can do the crappy charting that they usually have to do, richardson was very happy I learned how to do that because it was his job. Today I have only been home to eat and the rest of the day was spent at the hospital. The staff is hilarious just to watch and when I know what they are saying its even better. I have found I'm able to pick up on things even if they're in Kannada which is nice, especially when dealing with patients.
Today World Vision India came to the health clinic to do some community screenings so I got to take pictures with people like I was the queen and give my autograph... I'm not even joking. I so wanted to just sit in the nurses station doing paper work but since I was the foreign guest I had to go and pretend to be powerful. Most days I wish I was a chameleon so I could just change into the color of the people I was around, no one would stare at you, I would be just another person. It doesn't look like thats happening today so I'll just have to deal.

Prayer Requests

That I dont get TB
That I dont get AIDS
That I will be someone who can be a good example
That the patients get better
That the rain that I always pray for would let up when I'm walking around outside :) (rain makes it cooler out)
For Sacrayya's Aunt
That Dr. Abraham will let us paint
That the swedish girls coming soon are nice and speak english (I really like the two who are here now, one knows english really well).